JAN 4th – status

My college starts tomorrow after the holidays… which went by in a blink.

I have a lot.. I mean a LOT of work, projects and assignments to complete.

…Oh….

Now I am sharing this, instead of starting anything.

Okay.. let me start with statistics then…

Have a great day!!

-VANTSY105

New year!!!!!

Happy new year everybody!!!

so, recapping last year, first, I used a lot of ‘sometimes’ in what ever I wrote. second, my posts were random (meaning- me being lazy and procrastinating ) which leads to the third, I did not cope with the new subjects well( ’cause you know, I did not like them, at all) .

And then, there was me searching and seeing videos about illuminati, nostradamus etc and stuff, which I was paranoid about, for a week.( too MUCH information ).

At the end of the year, there was flood. I was in an emotional roller coster. I realised how we ‘college students’ were so naive and know so little about what is happening. ( hey, I don’t claim to know everything, infact I too am naive) but I’d like to think they would more be curious or be more thorough with what they hear or see and maybe try to put some energy to understand at least their own ‘friends’.

Oh well, so this year there are gonna be regular posts. maybe not about me, over thinking and writing about it. But some fun ones too.

lets have a great year of grow and happiness people!!

(I use ‘maybe’ a lot too)

p.s. This semester is a toughy.(I know its not a word)

-VANTSY105

If you must love me..

I don’t read a lot of poems… ( like not at all). but when   I read this, the one below, it is all the things that I’d say/feel when it comes to love.Be it your family or friends. And the back story behind this poem makes it even more special.

Such beauty, in these words.

Much love, in this sonnet.


If thou must love me.


If thou must love me, let it be for nought

Except for love’s sake only. Do not say,

“I love her for her smile—her look—her way

Of speaking gently,—for a trick of thought

That falls in well with mine, and certes brought

A sense of pleasant ease on such a day”—

For these things in themselves, Belovèd, may

Be changed, or change for thee—and love, so wrought,

May be unwrought so. Neither love me for

Thine own dear pity’s wiping my cheeks dry:

A creature might forget to weep, who bore

Thy comfort long, and lose thy love thereby!

But love me for love’s sake, that evermore

Thou mayst love on, through love’s eternity.

-Elizabeth Barrett Browning.

Part of me.

 

Even though it is old,

Even though it is a memory,

It still feels like yesterday.

 

Even though it was long ago,

Even though it should not bother anymore,

Its like I’m stuck in those moments.

 

Allowing it to ruin my now,

Allowing it to hinder my happy self.

 

I think of it to be a long forgotten path,

But an unforgettable part inside me.

 

I do not want to feel this way,

But all I do, I still live that inexplicable feeling.

 

I don’t want to stop it now,

Now that I have become tired.

I am not going to push it away,

Now that I realize it is a part of me.

 

It can be forgotten,

But then, can also be remembered,

For the way it built me.

 

I am not going to hide them,

Nor I wish to show them.

But to build and grow with it,

Now that it is a part of me.


 

hey! so how are your days?!

Thought of doing something and ended up writing this. 

With the new year being  just around the corner, it ‘kinda’ relates..

but it do not rhyme people. *ha…ha*

well, okay, HAPPY NEW YEAR then,

see you next year, with a new post!

-VANTSY105

What makes us beautiful?

 

When I was young I really did not know the concept of being beautiful. I was just a little girl trying to mind my own business and was happy with whatever I had. I played with whoever wanted to play and when I felt like playing.

But while I was in this childhood of innocence, I was pushed to a world were people judge, whether that person, to them, is good looking.

I never cared what would people think of me, I never thought of me as beautiful or otherwise. But, as I grew up in that same world, the way some treat you when they consider that you are not fit to be in that category, made me question myself.

And No, I was NOT bullied.

I just felt it. I could feel being set aside as they did not consider me in that category.

I was always a positive person, maybe I got it from my dad.

Though the insecurities started to come and go, I was always positive. When those insecurities got stronger (even though I did not know that I was in fact insecure) the songs at that time influenced me to be more than that.

 

Then, I grew up, finished school started college.

With the growing insecurities and the question of beauty lingering at my side, the ups of positiveness and the downs of negativeness , Showed its head more often.

 

You might be thinking. Okay, where is this girl going with this?

Well, you might have heard that being beautiful inside is more important than having it on your exterior.

And that got me thinking, and though I was/am 100 percent sure of this, I always struggled to keep my head high with confidence.

 

But now although I will not say that I figured it out. I learned something with the little experience I have.


 

Let me put it this way,

 

You hear, you see

You’re angry, you feel self-pity.

You wish to change, you wish to be someone else.

Then at the end of this cycle, you hate.

 

Then again, you see,

Now with your eyes open,

Seeing the world as it is.

You realize, you accept,

But do wish to change,

Wish to change you heart to turn to peace.

 

And then the love finds its way. The love for you.

That you can love, what you ought to love.

With this love, You make yourself beautiful.

 

And,that is  what makes us beautiful.

 

If anyone tells you otherwise,

The confidence might be shaken,

The confidence might take a dip.

But that’s okay.

‘cause you realize again,

Within a moment,

In that moment,

you keep the head high,

replying, so what?

‘cause you realize again,

about your beauty to love and give.

That your beauty is your confidence and kindness.

 

And that is what makes us beautiful.

 

Sometime I can truly feel when someone is really beautiful.

And those are the ones who inspire us and the world.

 

And when you question, what makes us beautiful?

 

I say, you will know,

I say, you will feel, that,

that beauty is inside you and

that is the beauty you show to the world.

 

And that is what makes us beautiful.

vantsy105

 

Our Choice.

I have nothing to talk about,

nothing to post about.

I have many things on my mind,

trying to wrap it around my head and accept,

it is how the world works.

Couldn’t seem to get it,

but forced to understand that,

that is how the world works.

 

Though with all the beauty beside us and inside us,

possibility for it to grow even more,

when and only when we feel grateful and humble,

and not for granted.

 

When there is so much love to give,

some/many choose to hate.

Maybe they have never experienced love,

or  just choose to not give the experience of being loved.

-VANTSY105